Wednesday, March 6, 2013

The Sunday Whirl Submission: From That Moment On

The Sunday Whirl-Wordle 98

From That Moment On

She is gone. Her body has stopped, following her heart, which was carried away weeks ago in tiny hands. She has found peace and more, and some might call her blessed. There are people here, though, who miss her. Many of those who were forgetting her as she sat in her room, remember her now. They are all sad, and some are very angry. Some of these people need to forgive her and will never be able to. The life that was meant to be hers is now gone, as well as the life that was supposed to be his.

He stands at the graves, both still new and wonders. All of his thoughts are incomplete sentences swirling like dust in his mind. The most developed thought focuses on the size of the mounds of dirt in front of him. The unbalance...He imagines that he hears wings...He is guided away by well-meaning hands, never hearing the words of comfort offered. As he rides home to the casseroles and hams and roasts and salads and cakes and pies he stares at the sky and wonders what is that color blue called? Has he ever seen that color before? He has captured a moment that he can think about later when he starts to feel again, and he is already beginning to survive. As the moments move to days, and weeks, and months and years, he sometimes feel that he has more than he deserves. He misses her and their baby, but he can think of them and, in that instant,  feel happy that they were his. Then he feels a slap of guilt that he was not able to save them. In the end, he is just a human being. What he couldn't give his wife, he is able to give himself, and he lives a good life.

So, here I am, writing this ending. This has been the hardest segment to write, and sitting on top of these three paragraphs are earlier versions that I am going to delete. I was not able to snare the happy ending that I wanted for her, but I think I did her justice. From the first written line, I was worried that I would end here. I have followed the story rather than exerting my will over it. And the bitch of it all is that I *gasp* like this version better.

The End.

written 3/6/13 for The Sunday Whirl Wordle 98 (click the link to see other submissions)

I'm tired, so not much of a write up here. The other parts of this story (in order) are

One Moment in One Day
 At Some Point Later
The Final Moment

You can click on the titles to read those posts.


  1. Sometimes there are no happy endings. Very touching, and thanks for leaving links to the previous installments. Maybe the next story can be a happier one!

    1. Hi Nico! Thank you, I am ready for a happy ending.

  2. the unbalance of the graves - I could just see him standing there looking at the difference. I enjoy your stories and look forward to another one!

  3. That's the thing about the wordle list of words. We may have an idea, but the words often seem to have a mind of their own. If you (me, anyone)try to force them to fit our preconceived ideas, they most often rebel and the result is telling. There is a relationship that must happen between writer and words, an openness and acceptance from both sides. That's why it's called creative writing and congratulations for staying with the lesson. Your story (I went back and read the other parts)is far more real and immediate than the happy ending you desired.


    1. Hi Elizabeth. Thank you for visiting. I think you're right, writing is a relationship. When I first saw this Wordle, I thought that it would work in easily and it was my biggest challenge so far.


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