Friday, March 20, 2015

The Secret Crush of a Middle-Aged Married Woman

You don't know
How my body heats up
At your name

Or how I
Can't not smile around you
And your smile

Your voice lifts
My mood and my thoughts
Making me better

With you I
Can talk for hours about
Truth and nonsense

The thought of
You has set up camp
in my mind

With it, I
Am never alone or lonely
You're with me

I am silly
Crushing on a man who
Is not mine

Especially when I
Have a very good man
Of my own

And I think
That he knows and I
Deny it loudly

I should stay
Far away from you until
This crush passes

I'm not brave
I can't tell you this
My embarrassing truth

I can't say
I need a time out
It's too personal

So I cope
With having teenage angst now
At this age

And still the sound of your
Voice and the curve of your smile wrap around my
Heart, weave through and crush me

written 3/20/15

I felt like writing something different tonight, but it seems like more of the same to me. I guess this is the danger of having an almost all first draft blog. I do really like the title, though. I decided to use Collum Lunes for the stanzas, so there are 13 of those. The last stanza is a Collum Lune doubled. So the word counts of the lines for the last stanza are 6, 10, 6. I liked playing with form.



  1. I really like this one. It really hits me where I lived... about a year ago with someone who thankfully moved far far away. (shhh! Don't tell! Nothing happened!)

    I like the push-pull angst of this as the writer struggles with her inner turmoil.

    1. Your secret is safe with me, Barry. :)

      And, thank you. Crushes can be horrible and wonderful, at the same time, but maybe better for teenagers.

  2. I think this is brilliant. I'm loving this form. You, as usual, have very efficient and effective word usage. And I suppose those secret crushes help keep life spicy.

    1. Thanks Bone! I like how you can use lunes alone or as stanzas of a longer poem.

      And the secret crush thing is growing less fun. There's a reason why teenagers are so moody. I discount the whole hormones, changing bodies, search for identity thing. It's the crushes. Although, this seems to have hit a note with some people in my less traffic-y places. Maybe there are more adult crushes than I was aware of.


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