Some Other Lines For the Fortune Cookies
Today is Crystal's birthday. Sing to her.
You should really have that thing on your arm looked at.
You are correct: Samuel L. Jackson is the coolest man on the planet.
That haircut you've been thinking about, do it.
In a fight between Batman and Superman, Wonder Woman wins.
That app you are thinking about downloading only needs 100 more downloads before it destroys the Earth.
Eat enough chocolate and discover the meaning of life.
The book you are writing will become Stephen King's favorite.
A cloud's silver lining usually means rain.
Even the smallest dog poops. So why do you have that thing in your purse?
Next time you're shopping in the Target, be sure to say hi.
Some things should never be remade. How did the new Nightstalker last more than one episode?
Your wife will meet you at the door with only a smile and a subpoena.
Next new craze: meat flavored smoothies.
Remember that your garbage service will be delayed a day due to the holiday.
Four words: Hello Kitty Duct Tape.
Seriously that thing on your arm is gross get it looked at now.
lasagna is brain food. Consume daily.
heidi
written for 
So first, a big blushing thank you to NaPoWriMo for the feature today. Yesterday's poem Rotomontade was featured and The Fight was mentioned. So, if you are visiting from that link, welcome! I hope you enjoy your time here. Today's prompt was to re-write Frank O'Hara's poem Lines For the Fortune Cookies. It was fun, but this isn't as funny as I wanted it to be. I find that when I try to write something funny, it falls kind of flat. Although, no kidding, get that thing looked at and possibly cut off and sent to the lab.
Happy Birthday Crystal!
So many of these are funny but "Why do you have that thing in your purse?" is a very good question! How do the stars carry their dogs like that? Mine would never sit still! T
ReplyDeleteI always feel sorry for the poor puppies, but that line was a funnier way to write it. My sweet Emma was a shepherd/doberman mix, and I'm not sure I have a purse that would have been big enough for her. She, like your dog, probably wouldn't have liked it.
DeleteThis is a hoot!
ReplyDeleteHi Mama Zen! Welcome to the lasagna. I am glad you liked it, come back anytime.
DeleteWhat a fun post!
ReplyDeleteThank you Madeleine!
DeleteI think that this is very funny.
ReplyDeleteI love to publish “funny” stuff, but at the moment that I press “publish” I always think that it's silly and trite, and not funny at all. The more humorous that I try to be, the more paranoid I become.
Have a good week.
Hi Sleepshort. I hate that feeling especially when the initial idea is very funny, and then the worry that you've messed it up. Although it is comforting that I'm not alone. Thanks for the visit and have a good week too!
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